TWO TITLES

A “title” is an identifying name given to a book, play or a film, which in a nutshell conveys the essence of the work.  Many creators are successful in providing an apt title for their work, while some make the audience/readers speculate the relationship between the title and the work.

I have always wondered which comes first to the mind of a creator; the title or the story.  I think both are possible.

I have till date watched many films and read several books.  Please rest assured I am not going to analyze or review them with respect to their titles.  I am going to discuss a film I have not watched and a book I have not read.

I was a very obedient and a submissive person in my formative years.  The very fact that I have used a simple past to describe my behaviour obviously explains my present nature.

For a very long time in my life, I didn’t feel the need to rebel or oppose, as I grew up in a very protective atmosphere.  I was adored at home, at my neighbours’ homes, at schools, at college and wherever I went, which boosted my confidence and self-esteem.  Things were no different when I started work.  My bosses loved me and protected me just like my family members.  But life is not a fairy tale and every person faces setbacks. 

As time passed, I had to tackle rejections, failures etc.  I was certainly not geared to handle them.  Added to this, I had a bullying colleague. 

Though I am perceived to be an aethist by people around me because of my rational and non-ritualistic approach, I am a great believer in God and feel God is omnipresent and provides us with solutions to all problems in an objective manner and it is up to us to choose the appropriate one.

In mid-nineties ( I don’t remember exactly when) one afternoon, I settled down to watch a film on TV and within a few minutes of commencement of the show, there was a power interruption which lasted for a few hours and I missed the film.  This happened in the pre-cable/satellite TV era and so there was no chance of a repeat telecast.

I should confess, no other film title impressed me as much as this one – Salim Langde Pe Mat Ro.  I don’t know what the story is about.  But, I assumed from the name Salim that the protagonist is a Muslim and Langde is some handicap/disadvantage of the protagonist and ‘Mat Ro” an advice, not to crib.  Many times in life, we keep complaining and cribbing about our failures, as a result of which, we either remain where we are or deteriorate further.  On that particular afternoon I did not take up any other work, hoping for the power to resume and in the meantime, had a thorough introspection and decided that I will never crib about any of my handicaps and I am happy I have not violated my decision.  We are as big or as small as we think we are.

When we are surrounded by well-wishers, one thing we will certainly not learn to say in any language is “No” as we always feel compelled to please them, as a result of which at the end of the day feel exploited.

In my earlier assignment, when most of my colleagues were very cordial, there was one particular person holding a responsible position in the office, was different.  He made fun of me, created obstacles at work and harassed me at every possible opportunity.  I analyzed the problem.  He was prejudiced against women, against my community and was very uncomfortable about the fact that like him, I too had access to all the top bosses.  Though I understood the backdrop, I was not at all conditioned to handle the crisis.  One day he called me to his room and made me wait and started conversing over phone.  When I attempted to leave the room, he signaled to me to wait.  As he kept on talking, to kill time, I took the book kept on his table into my hands and read the title “Don’t Say Yes When You Want to Say No”.  I took it as a solution to my problem and interrupted him and said politely “If you are busy, I will come again”.  He disconnected the phone and tried to dump me with someone else’s work as usual.  Motivated by the title of the book on his table, I said a firm “No” much to his surprise. I have never tried to read that book.  But the title made me more assertive.  Since then, I have uttered the word “No” whenever I did not want to say “Yes”.

I don’t want to exaggerate the role of the “titles” in my metamorphosis, but they certainly have played a significant role.