GODDESSES OF WEALTH

“Aadadani chethilo artham, magavani chethilo bidda dakkavu” is an oft quoted Telugu proverb, which can be loosely translated as “money in the hands of woman and a child in the hands of a man, don’t survive”.  Though I personally feel, gender has nothing to do with financial management, there are many women, who prove otherwise.

Last week, I read the news that a lady in Bengaluru committed suicide after losing Rs.11 Lakhs (1.1 million) to a fraudster.  This lady had received either a message or a mail from a New Delhi based fraudster that she had won 45 Lakhs in a lottery.  Trusting the news, she had given him her bank details without her family members’ knowledge.  After winning over her confidence, the fraudster made her transfer several lakhs of rupees to various accounts citing legal obstacles.  It took a while for her to realise that she had been cheated and when she realised, she could not cope and after a failed suicide attempt, died.  She is not an illiterate.  She is not poor.  Apparently, she is one, who enjoyed financial independence.  Still, her end is sad.

An acquaintance of mine once requested me to accompany her to her friend’s house to collect money her friend had borrowed and was reluctant to return.  Though her income is modest, her husband earns well and he gave her full freedom to manage the money.  She secretly lent huge money without considering the risk factors. I don’t know how much exactly she lent, but she didn’t get back any money.

In the 60’s much before I was born, wife of a popular Telugu actor had mocked a theft at home and sold her jewels through her friend, to support her parents financially.  Though an FIR was registered, since it was a job of the insider, nothing could be done.  Probably, the husband would also have come to know of it, but how he handled it is not known.  This lady was neither educated, nor employed.  Though her husband was rich, she didn’t have any access to money.

We had a relative, who had no financial discipline.  She never planned her expenditure, as a result of which, there was always a shortage of money. She borrowed from neighbours and relatives often and sometimes, when they were unable to fund, she would pledge her jewels through her maid servant for paltry amount and almost lost all her jewellery, as she didn’t keep track of the transactions and also could not repay to claim them.  Most of her relatives and neighbours believed that her maid servant was lending her money or she was claiming the jewels by repaying the loans.

A decade ago, while I was in office, I received a call from a colleague’s wife.  She told me that she was in deep trouble and wanted me to lend her a couple of thousands.  When I wanted to know the reason, she said that she had pledged her jewels to buy gifts for her niece’s wedding, without her husband’s knowledge and permission and since there was a wedding in the family, she had to reclaim the jewels, before anyone finds this.  She promised she would return my money in two or three instalments without fail at the earliest.  I didn’t have that money.  I neither had a debit/credit card not had net banking facility then.  Since she was in a great hurry, I borrowed money from another colleague for the first time in my life and gave it to her.  She could not return the money as promised.  After a few months, in the absence of the receptionist, when I picked up a call from her, she cried inconsolably and apologised for not having kept up her promise and said she was in deep trouble and that she was contemplating suicide.  I felt very sad and told her that I was writing off that loan and requested her to discuss with her husband.  I offered to speak to her husband on her behalf as she was very hesitant, but she said she would manage it herself and again sought a promise from me that I wouldn’t discuss this issue with her husband.  After a few months, I learnt from some of my other colleagues that it was her modus operandi and month after month, she was approaching all our colleagues one by one.  I felt, her husband should be informed about it, before the issue becomes too big for them to handle.  After several rehearsals, I spoke to him.  He was not surprised or shocked as I anticipated.  He was very upset that his wife was exposed and immediately returned the money given by me and my colleagues.  Apparently, this lady was a guarantor for a loan borrowed by her neighbour and since the neighbour had defaulted repayment, she had to repay as a guarantor. 

A relative of ours had literally lost her house by organizing a chit fund.  She operated it without any registration and probably illegally.  Some of those, who drew the money from the chits did not pay and she had to repay to all other members and with no money left, she sold her only house for repaying.

I have heard of women who sell their ornaments to buy expensive clothes and accessories. There are also some employed women, who spend all their earnings on clothes, gadgets, accessories and personal care and force husbands to shoulder all the household expenses and feel proud that they are reducing the husband’s burden to an extent. I have read about women, who note down the pin numbers on their debit/credit cards and have lost a lot of money when they have lost their cards. I have heard of women, who lost their valuables while picking up a currency note dropped by the thieves. 

There are educated women, who don’t distinguish between a cheque and a DD. There are many women, who have absolutely no knowledge of taxation rules/benefits.

Is it not time women get familiarized with all this?

It is absolutely wrong to generalize that, women are incapable of handling finances.  The common factor in the lives of most of the wealthy men is that their finances are manged by their women (mothers/wives).  I have also seen some illiterate women, who handle their money well and have created wealth.

Many Banks and NBFCs in India are headed by women and may be our next RBI Governor could be a woman!

Financial discipline has nothing to do with gender.  Primarily, people should understand that there are no shortcuts.  They should learn to live within their means, save, invest and keep updating about the market conditions and State Polices and general trends. 

There certainly needs to be a complete transparency between the couples and they should set limits for their independent expenditure.  They should get into an arrangement where any expenditure, investment or surety beyond their independent limit should be made known to each other and a decision is taken only after a debate.  This kind of partnership will reduce chances of losing money by either of them.

It is time, women make proverbs like the one quoted, redundant.